Who doesn’t want to be in a relationship? After all, relationships do come with certain perks. You have someone to talk to, share your financial responsibilities with, and you don’t have to take on the world alone. It can also improve your physical and psychological well-being considerably, making you a better and more compassionate person. However, being in a relationship isn’t all wine and roses. It needs hard work and dedication to build a happy and healthy romantic relationship with the woman you love.

When it comes to having a successful relationship, understanding what excites your partner both physically and emotionally should be at the top of your priority list. Unfortunately, most men think that women are complicated and hence keeping them happy and excited in a relationship is next to impossible. But, they are dead wrong. Women are not as complicated as men think.

Here is what you can do to keep her excited and immersed in love forever.

1. The Physical Perspective

Some people may think that sex is overrated in a relationship. On the contrary, it can be a much more meaningful experience when you share it with a person you love, whether it is a long-term relationship or the one that’s just starting out. Sex helps maintain a high level of intimacy that both you and your partner need to make your relationship work.

Set up the Atmosphere

The most common argument is that women tend to focus more on love and less on sex. Especially in a long-term relationship, women will want to have less and less sex over time. That’s not necessarily true. But women do take some time to get into the mood for the action. That’s why you will have to go the extra mile to create the right romantic atmosphere that will put her in the mood.

The bedroom has to feel sensual and inviting. So, music and candles are a must. Subdued lighting also helps to create a romantic atmosphere. But, don’t overkill it with dozens of candles and overly erogenous music. You can also bring something such as lingerie that makes her feel confident and sexy. Remember, however, this night is about you and her. So, make sure you have plenty of time to spend together. Your purpose should be to make her feel relaxed and allow her to surrender to her sexual desires as you do. Tell her that it’s okay to get away from her responsibilities and explore her intimate side occasionally.

A Little Foreplay Can Go a Long Way

Compared to men, women may take a little longer to get an orgasm and reach climax. That’s why you will need the added intimacy of a little foreplay to turn your romantic night into a complete enjoyment. In other words, it will show your wife or girlfriend that you care about her sexual satisfaction as much as you care about yours.

Most women complain that men pay more attention to the main act. So, spend more time discovering new sensitive areas starting from the neck and going all the way down to her feet. Make sure to massage or kiss every sweet spot to make her go crazy, in a good way. You can also try telling her how you enjoy touching her in the middle of the foreplay. Ask her if she is enjoying this too. Knowing that you are doing it right will want you to keep doing it more often.

Appreciate Her Sexuality

Women usually respond to praise very well. Appreciating her sexuality by showering her with admiration is probably the best way to excite her. If you like a particular body part, quality, or feature of your partner, make sure to let her know. Keep reminding her of that thing constantly. The more you praise something, the more you will see of it.

Sometimes, she will take the initiative to get a little action. She may want to dress up or get into a role-play. When she does, don’t discourage her from expressing her sexuality. Be positive about it. Sexual shaming can hurt her deeply. It may stop her from responding to your sex acts in future. On the other hand, if you respond with gentleness and sensitivity, she will do it more often.

2. The Emotional Perspective

When it comes to a relationship, the emotional connections of the heart matter a great deal for a woman. She wants to feel emotionally secure and confident that you will stand by her side no matter what. If you provide your partner with the emotional connection that clicks, you will be able to have an exciting relationship with her in and outside the bedroom.

Listen and Act

Women want to feel heard. They are inherently emotional beings. Communication is a way for them to make sure they feel loved and safe with you. Your girlfriend or wife is also most likely to express her emotional insecurities and desires verbally. But, communication is a two-way street. So, whether she is talking about what she is cooking for dinner or having a more serious conversation such as getting pregnant, make sure to put away your mobile or any other distractions, and focus. Always make a conscious effort to listen to her.

Notice her tone and inflection. Pay attention to her and your body language as well. Avoid making judgments or retorting with a disdain. Try to put yourself in her shoes and take a closer look at the things she is saying. If you are too busy to take a few moments for a one-on-one discussion or travelling constantly, you can encourage her to share her thoughts and feelings over phone, text, email or online chat if she is comfortable doing so.

Listening is essential, but actions speak better than words. After listening to her end of the story, you need to back up your promises with actions. If your actions are inconsistent with your words, it will send a wrong message to her. If you promise to mow the lawn or get the groceries, do it without fail.

Create Innate Closeness

Women are also looking for innate closeness in a relationship. No, I am not talking about the intimacy during sex. Of course, desire for sexual intimacy is important. But, the need for emotional intimacy is even more essential. She will occasionally want to spend some time with you, do something together, and have some fun other than in the bedroom. Being together with her partner gives the woman a sense of security and strength which is perfectly natural.

It’s easy to fall into comfortable ruts, especially in a long-term relationship. Sometimes, she may miss going on dates, romantic candlelight dinners or the movie marathons. So, you will need to find out ways to spend more quality time together. You can plan a surprise date or cook her favorite dinner. It doesn’t have to be an expensive extravaganza. Sometimes, what truly matters to her is that you put some thought into doing something special for her. This notion alone will bring you closer to her emotionally.

Show the Signs of Stability and Commitment

Women are inherently wired to look for emotional stability. They want to know that the relationship is stable. She will not be willing to spend her affections on someone who isn’t around when she needs him the most. She should be able to count on you.

Sharing household responsibilities is one way to show her that she can count on you. Chances are both you may be working for a living. So, she won’t be able to take the sole responsibility of the house anyway. So, why not cook the dinner sometime, clean the dishes or take out the garbage? It sends a message that you are committed to being with her. You have to show your ability and willingness for a profound emotional commitment through your actions, not just words.

Mutual Respect

Women also crave for mutual respect from men that goes beyond the bedroom. Whether or not she is a breadwinner like you, she deserves the same amount of respect you do. You not only should respect her body but also admire her mind and heart. Unfortunately, mutual respect remains one of the most underrated and under-observed things in a relationship.

If you think only emotionally and physically abusive relationships lack mutual respect, you are wrong. Seemingly trivial things such as showing flashes of facial contempt or using a condescending tone in conversations or pretending to listen or having a preference for one type of thing over another can lead to the loss of mutual respect.

Having respect is about setting and respecting boundaries, even in your daily routine. You can’t and shouldn’t take her for granted. Whether you are thinking about trying a new sex act or buying a new car, you should ask her opinion and decide accordingly. Making her feel uncomfortable physically and emotionally is the last thing you want.

Parting Words

Contrary to the popular belief, knowing what women want in a relationship is not rocket science. The things they want are not as complicated as people paint them to be. Apart from the obvious things such as sexual satisfaction and appreciation, they also need emotional stability, commitment, and mutual respect. Hopefully, these tips will help you provide your girlfriend or wife with all these things. If you do, it will dramatically increase your chances of having both better sex and better relationship for years to come.


Anna Perkins is a relationship writer who offers her own forthright opinion over the worlds of dating, romance, relationships , marriage and friendships. She loves cats, traveling, spending time with her son and husband.

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