How women think? What women think? This is always a big mystery to most men. Women think differently than men. While most men use about 80% logic when making a decision, women use 80% emotion in doing that. No wonder it is very hard for average men to understand women and why they do what they do.

For example, let’s look around us. I believe everyone of us ever see this weird view: a very beautiful girl, pure and shining like an angel, goes hand in hand, hugging tightly a one-headed cerberus-look guy tongue emo in her arms as though she’s afraid to lose him.

(Do you know cerberus? It’s a big ugly three-headed dog which guards the Tartarus, the home of the dead).

Does the “cerberus” seems rich? Or intelligent? Or handsome? No way! The guy just doesn’t fit with the scene. It’s like the beauty and the beast, a pollution to our eyes.

And worse than that, we often see too that it is the girl who seems to care and love the guy so much, while the guy seems ignorant to her as if he would dump her anytime he wishes. I don’t think he even ever tried to find romantic date ideas, fun date ideas, first date ideas or something like that to make her happy.

But sadly, she chose him anyway. Why? Is she blind, stupid, or what? In a sense, yes she is. But it’s just because we see it through our eyes, through our logical male minds.

But remember, she is not a guy. She is a girl – a woman – with her own way of thinking. Her brain is structured in such a way that made her emotions have much stronger influence on her than her logic. Unless we are willing to accept that reality, it will be very hard for us to understand how women think and what women think.

Why on earth there are so many women choose “bad boys” instead of all the good & respectable guys around them? To understand this phenomenon about how women think, there are certain things that we must be familiar with.

First, let’s learn the process behind a decision making in our brain. The process is very similar in both men and women. (A bit scientific though big-grin emo).

The Triune Brain Theory

According to “The Triune Brain Theory” by Dr Paul MacLean, human brain consists of 3 parts:

R-Complex, includes the brain stem and cerebellum. R-Complex is also called reptilian brain because its structure is like the brain of reptilians which mainly composed of only brain stem and cerebellum.

This part controls physical aspects of body, instinctual survival behaviors and thinking as well as the muscles, balance and autonomic system such as heartbeat and breathing.

Limbic System. Derives from “the old mammalian brain”.

The limbic system is the source of emotions and instincts. It was observed that everything in the limbic system is either “agreeable or disagreeable.” Survival is based upon the avoidance of pain (disagreeable) and the recurrence of pleasure (agreeable).

Neocortex also known as cerebral cortex.

Neocortex is found in the brain of higher mammals. It is responsible for higher-order thinking skills, reason, speech, and wisdom.

Broca’s Area and RAS (Reticular Activating System)

To understand how women think or what women think, there are 2 more parts of the brain that we should be familiar with before proceeding: Broca’s area and RAS (Reticular Activating System). These 2 parts play essential roles in decision making process.

Broca’s area is a region of the brain with functions linked to speech production and language comprehension. But it also is involved in various cognitive and perceptual tasks, including interpreting action of others. So, if there is an activity/action around, this broca’s area will detect and try to identify it.

RAS (Reticular Activating System), on the other hand, is an area of the brain responsible for regulating arousal and sleep-wake transitions. It is in this RAS the brain will determine whether the activity/action detected by broca’s area significant or not. If it is, this RAS will make us keep focused on it. But if not, then that activity/action won’t get focus but placed in the background instead. This is an important point to remember for us to understand how women think.

Decision Making Process

The activities/actions around us will first be filtered by broca’s area and RAS. Only if an action considered important, it will then be brought to the decision making process. If not, it will only labeled as background activities and stays there.

So, the point is, if we want to get special attention from the girl we have crush on, we should do or act in a special way that can attract her attention. Or else, she will only see us for some short moments and than switch to more interesting things around her.

To understand how women think or what women think, we will first examine the role of each part of the brain in the decision making process. There are at least 3 aspects to consider when one must make a decision: physical, logical and emotional aspects.

A man or woman will make a decision on a certain thing after his/her brain can somewhat be convinced:

  • physically (R-Complex, physical brain),
  • emotionally (limbic system)
  • logically (neurocortex)

Physical brain (R-Cortex) will not be satisfied unless we can provide it with physical proof that can be seen, touched, heard, smelled or tasted. But the logical brain (neurocortex) won’t bother the physical evidence. It says, “As long as it is logical, I believe it”.

But the limbic part works differently. It says, “I don’t care if there is physical proof or not or if it’s logical or not. As long as I *feel* that I can believe it, I will believe it”.

How Women Think

Unlike men who most of them based their decision making 80% on proofs & logic (R-Complex & neurocortex), women based their decision 80% on emotion (limbic system). That’s how women think. That’s the main reason why many women/girls choose to get along with a man/boy that seems very “inadequate” compared to them.

The girl might have preference for tall, handsome, rich and gallant man. It is logical. But, she is an emotional being. She mainly responds to her emotions. If that “ugly” guy can “play” her emotions the right way, it is very probably that the beautiful girl will choose him over hundreds of other “much more promising” guys!

So, the key is the emotion. Never ever try to attract any girl/woman logically. You will fail! In fact, this is why most men failed miserably when trying to attract their dream girls.

They become very nice to the girl they’re attracted to: buy her expensive gifts, always available on request, show so much love etc.. They think, by doing all that the girl will be impressed and will learn to love them in return.

But sadly, usually they fail. Why? Because they tried to attract her using logical way. It is logical to expect the girl we show our affection to will also love us in return. But that’s not the way how women think. It doesn’t work that way!

Think of it this way: if the girl is very attractive, there must be so many men that will try to get her attention using the same logical way: buying her gifts, showing her much attention etc. If you also do that, you’ll only be one among many, nothing special.

In addition, by doing that you present yourself to the girl as predictable, i.e. boring, and not challenging. You will be emotionally unattractive to her. So, what to do?

Attract her emotionally: make her respect you by showing her that you have confidence in yourself, make her fun by telling good jokes, make her curious about you by being somewhat mysterious & challenging etc..

If you want to know more about how to attract women the right way, this book provides more in-depth discussion as well as tips on tricks that are simple enough for every man to do.


Anna Perkins is a relationship writer who offers her own forthright opinion over the worlds of dating, romance, relationships , marriage and friendships. She loves cats, traveling, spending time with her son and husband.

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