How He Knew She Was The OneListen up, ladies. Guys have a romantic side. I know. I’m having hard time believing it too, but it’s true.

When I was given the opportunity to write this article, I jumped at the chance but realized I’d be tackling one of the biggest questions anyone in a serious relationship has ever attempted to answer. From the male perspective, how do you know that she’s the right woman for you? And I know as a woman, I’m always curious how guys think and I can’t be the only wondering what exactly is it that guys are looking for in a serious relationship? What makes them give up the swingin’ single life and settle down?

So I asked my guy friends and loyal Kate’s Dates readers two simple questions:
– How did you know she was The ONE?
– and how did you feel about taking yourself off the market?

I didn’t have very high expectations with regards to the responses – probably because I spend most of my time writing about my disastrous dates with various incarnations of Mr. Wrong. I expected them to either ignore me completely or respond with some dopey neanderthalish equivalent to, “she’s hot and she let me watch football.” I could actually hear them all grunting. So I was shocked that all (yes, ALL) of the responses were incredibly thoughtful and heartfelt. After reading what these married/engaged/taken guys had to say, I got all choked up and I will happily admit I was wrong.

Ahem, let me repeat that for all my male readers because I know this will bring you a great deal of joy: I WAS WRONG.

Originally I had planned to put their thoughts and sentiments into my own words and incorporate them into this article. But I realized it was better to let their words speak for themselves. I loved hearing these guys wax rhapsodic about the women in their lives and how they happily walked away from bachelorhood in exchange for true love. I’m starting to get all misty eyed just thinking about it because I’m a hopeless, emotional romantic.

Thanks to these fine gentlemen, I learned two very important things that I want to emphasize. First, for those of you women out there who are convinced that there are no decent guys out there, these guys are proof positive that you are wrong. Sure, they happen to be taken but the fact that they were single at some point is sufficient evidence that decent guys exist. It is possible to find someone who absolutely adores you so don’t get discouraged by those various incarnations of Mr. Wrong that we’ve all encountered along the way.

Secondly, what I’m about to share with you demonstrates that despite the differences between men and women that often result in miscommunication and frustration, we have the same fundamental hopes and dreams when it comes to a lasting relationship. We all want that magical connection that serves as the basis for fairy tales and romantic comedies. When it comes to true love, we’re all on the same page.

So without further ado, grab a tissue as I present you with How He Knew She Was The One:

  • I don’t think there was an official “aha” moment for me but shortly after we started dating, I noticed my behavior changed. I found myself doing things I never did before. I wasn’t interested in picking up other women. I just wanted to spend time with her.
  • In 3 simple words – it was effortless.
  • From the moment we first spoke on the phone, I knew there was a connection. The rapport was instantaneous; from the sound of her voice to the topics we discussed. Over the next few weeks, I broke a few hearts, but I didn’t even give it a second thought. She was the one I wanted to spend time with and we are now married with 3 young daughters.
  • If you have to ask the question, then the person you are with is not the right person for you. It sounds cliché, but you just know and then you are happy to pull yourself off the market.
  • The way we related to each other on our first date had the waitress asking if we were celebrating an anniversary. The next day, I announced to my co-workers that I was going to marry her. That was over 22 years ago.
  • The connection was complete; physically, emotionally, intellectually.
  • I had done my fair share of searching, if you know what I mean. My wife is so far above anyone else I ever met, it was an easy decision. I have succeeded in finding a perfectly complementary partner who has completely given me the best of who she is. I hope I keep up and completely give her my best.
  • She sees me for who I truly am. She cuts through my bullshit and I love that about her.
  • I knew she was the one on our first date. And I was upset because I was hoping to have at least one more year of wild bachelorhood. But when you find a good one you hang it up.
  • I don’t know how else to explain it; she’s home.

Is your partner the one? Does she make you feel like some of the above comments? Please share how you knew your partner was “the one”.


Anna Perkins is a relationship writer who offers her own forthright opinion over the worlds of dating, romance, relationships , marriage and friendships. She loves cats, traveling, spending time with her son and husband.

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