In today’s world, where the main value is time, speed dating events are becoming more and more popular way to find love or friends sharing common interests with you and expand your social circle. At speed dating events, each participant goes through 10-15 tete-a-tete dates in one evening, having just a couple of minutes for each of them. The impression you make on your companion during these couple of minutes largely depends on how you look and what you say. So it’s better to know how to act and what to ask in advance.

Three main rules at every speed dating event

1) Good mood

Your number one priority is to stay positive when attending the event. Be sure that you’re ready to have a great time and meet new people, make connections, or even find that special someone. So having a good mood is a must.

2) Come alone

A speed dating event is not the type of place you bring your friends with, and not because you turn them into your competitors. The thing is that during the most of the evening, your attention will be constantly drawn to your friend. And it’s not the reason why you came here, right?

3) Know what to say

According to the rules of any speed dating event, men always ask questions first. That’s why if you’re a guy, it’s better to prepare a small list of questions beforehand (or take a couple of ones below). If you’re a woman, don’t get mad at men for asking the same questions over and over again. Instead, help them by supporting the conversation. Remember that your companion also sees you for the first time in his/her life.

Top 25 questions for speed dating events

To speed up your search process, I picked up a list of 25 most interesting questions to help you keep the conversation going for several minutes and learn as much about your companion as possible.

  1. So, what’s your profession? – It works as an introductory question that helps to reveal the person’s occupation. Here I should note that after your companion answers, don’t start building a conversation upon this question (more about this below).
  2. What’s your zodiac sign? – For some people, the answer to this question is quite important when choosing a partner.
  3. Is there anything you would like to tell me about yourself? – We’re talking about some individual traits of your companion.
  4. When did your last relationship end, and how long did it last? – It will help you understand how much the relationships as a whole are important to this person.
  5. What do you expect from a relationship? – This question allows you to determine if you have the same views on relationships. It’s one of their easiest ways to understand if you fit each other.
  6. Would you like to start a family? – It’s an important question that determines the person’s attitude towards marriage.
  7. Would you like to have children? – This is also a great question if you’re looking for serious relationships, and your companion is not. Of course, if you don’t plan to have kids, skip it.
  8. How do you spend your free time? – This question may help you understand if you share any common interests.
  9. Is there something that you are proud of? – The answer will reveal your companion’s basic values in life, so consider asking it.
  10. Do you believe in love at first sight? – The question itself is not as important as the other ones. But you can find out if the person sitting in front of you is romantic.
  11. What’s your favorite month of the year and why? – Maybe this month is connected with some significant event?
  12. What’s your favorite book/movie? – Both of you can discuss some movie or a novel and get to know each other better.
  13. How do you imagine a perfect date? – This is an excellent question for starting a conversation. You can ask it first.
  14. What’s your favorite music\band\singer? – This way you can see whether you share musical tastes.
  15. Do you like animals? Do you have a pet? – Maybe you’re allergic to cats, and your companion has a couple of cats.
  16. If you could be an animal, which one would you choose? – Just a funny question to laugh.
  17. How do you think, is the glass half empty or half full? – So you can understand whether your companion is a pessimistic person or an optimistic one.
  18. If you could go back to the past, what would you change? – Does your companion have deep regrets?
  19. If you win the lottery, where would you spend your winnings? – A question to make the conversation run smoothly.
  20. What can make you laugh, and what makes you cry? – The question to find out what your companion likes and what she/he doesn’t.
  21. Can you describe your perfect vacation? – Someone may tell about the week at an ocean beach; others prefer skiing in the mountains.
  22. What TV shows do you never miss? – Do your tastes match? Perhaps your partner is interested in completely different things.
  23. Do you like getting up early in the morning or not? – This question will help you understand if your biorhythms match?
  24. If you could live anywhere in the world, which place would you choose? – Another question to cheer up the companion.
  25. What qualities do you value in people? Why? – This way you can assess your companion’s nature, so it’s better to ask this question right from the start.

Sure, there are dozens of other questions to ask at a speed dating event. The main thing here is to clearly define for yourself what exactly you are looking for in a partner. Choose those questions, answers to which are closer to your heart and really matter.

Things you shouldn’t discuss at a speed dating event

Studies and job

Every single day your companion has to go to work or college, or even combines both activities. He/she probably came to an event to relax and get distracted from everyday life. So by asking how long his/her working day lasts, how your companion likes other staff there, you may come across as an intrusive and annoying person. You can talk about job or studies only if your companion enjoys them.

Things that men/women love

Leave the conversations about football or the last fashion week to your friends. Even if you start talking about stuff like that, your companion will listen to you and maybe even smile only out of courtesy. After all, you too wouldn’t enjoy discussing something that doesn’t interest you. Of course, if your companion loves the same stuff as you do, then such topics are perfect for conversation.

Boasting, talking only about yourself

That’s why you should choose only those topics that interest you both. Your conversation should be emotional, try to make your companion smile, wonder, and laugh. The conversation should go according to the following plan: your companion tells a story from his/her life, while you listen. After a brief discussion, tell something about yourself.

In conclusion

And remember, the main thing at a speed dating event is to feel confident. And if you don’t, then pretend that you’re confident. Don’t forget to smile and look great. Avoid too personal questions and, perhaps, you’ll find someone you’ve always been looking for.


Anna Perkins is a relationship writer who offers her own forthright opinion over the worlds of dating, romance, relationships , marriage and friendships. She loves cats, traveling, spending time with her son and husband.

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