Relationships are always hard! Breaking up with someone you are still in love with is surely one of the hardest things you might have ever gone through. And it doesn’t help at all if your Ex has moved on to her next relationship and is busy seeing someone else. That final nail on your coffin makes you lose all hope of winning her back and rekindling your lost love. But should you give upon your love that fast? Could you get your ex back even if she is already dating? A simple and straight ‘Yes’ is the best answer to this! With the right steps and right moves, making her fall for you isn’t going to be impossible!

Winning your girl back isn’t exactly rocket science but it is a science nevertheless. Doing the right things and having the right mind set for this is really important for that to happen.

Do not lose Hope and be Patient

Patience is the key to getting back your ex-girlfriend from her new guy. Believe in your ability to make her fall for you and give it some good time as well. Do not rush into being hopeless and disheartened. Remember that a hopeless guy is never a winner! And on the other side, a patient approach is going to do you wonders. Give her enough time to figure out her true feelings for you.

Relax, it is most probably just a Rebound!

This new guy she has made a straight jump to is in all probability just a rebound relationship she has gotten herself into. Do understand that the chances of it getting serious or working out well is going to be very very slim. All you have got to do is to give it some time. Just relax and let her figure out that she is in fact in a pointless rebound relationship. Compared to the beautiful strong relationship that you both shared, this new guy is never going to be a good substitute for you. Meanwhile, stay clear of doing anything stupid that could worsen your case.

She is going to try to make you jealous, do not fall for that Trap

Rebound or not, it might be real hard for you to the digest the fact that your ex-girlfriend is dating someone else. But for our plan to work, make sure that you stay cool about it! There might be instances when you see her with this new guy, but you should be completely cool about it. Do not show that you are jealous or that you do not approve of this new guy she has found. Hold your anger and emotions even in the worst possible scenarios. Never act rude with the new guy she is dating. It is important that you act mature and cool about the new relationship she is in. This mature behaviour you show would confuse her and she would soon start to get frustrated and in the end would lead to messing up her new found relationship.

Rebounds don’t Work, but could work in your Favour

A rebound relationship is a quick, stupid decision taken by your ex-girlfriend to get over your broken relationship. There is never much true love or passion in such a temporary relationship. Even if this rebound guy turns out to be a nice guy, there still won’t be much connection between them. This guy most probably would not be compatible with your girl and sooner or later, she would realize that it was just a big mistake she made. The rebound relationship might have turned out to be a truly miserable experience for her. It is natural that she would be comparing you with this rebound guy and you would easily be the winner if that is the case. This would flood in her mind doubts about breaking up the great relationship you guys had cherished.

Give her enough time to Think

Once you have heard that her rebound relationship isn’t working out well, do give her enough time to ponder over the mistake she made. Make sure that you do no move in too fast and too eagerly. She would need some time to get the rebound guy out of her mind and replace it with you.

When the Right Time comes, Act

Once her rebound relationship has begun to go down under, it is time for you resume small conversations with her. Something as simple as a casual text message is a good start. Make sure that you take it slow. Use the vulnerable state she is in to your advantage. Start out with casual topics and show that you are there for her. Slowly and steadily, climb back into her heart.

Casual Conversation and Meet-ups

Begin casually! She is probably looking for a friend and that is exactly what you have to be for the time being. Do not give it away that you are still sexually interested in her. Casual conversations and meet-ups can slowly be turned into slightly flirty attempts to get back with her. Take it slow and do not scare her with a surprise move.

Let her Know when you are Ready

If everything works out well, it is time for you to drop hints that you want to get back with her. Tell her that the time apart has made you realize how important she is to you. Convince her that you are going to work on the mistakes you made the last time. With better communication, effort and a lot of patience, you could turn your relationship into a long term commitment.

Other things you should Take Care of while she is Seeing Someone Else

It doesn’t mean that you should just leave it to her new boyfriend to mess it up for you to clean up and take control of. There are other things to be taken care of if you want to get back with your ex-girlfriend who is seeing someone else. It is important that you sell yourself as the best guy she has ever been with it. Try and be the perfect gentleman anyone would want to be with.

Time to Introspect

This little time apart should be used to do some introspection and self-examination. It helps to figure out why she decided to walk out on your relationship. Rewind and realize your mistakes and the next time, improve upon them! Learn what went wrong and what could have gone better! Next time, make sure that you approach your relationship with a bit more maturity and responsibility.

Think from her Point of View

Change in perceptions could ruin relationships. Everything changes based on where you look at it from. View everything from your girlfriend’s angle and try and put yourself in her shoes. This could help you understand what she wants and why she does certain things in certain situations. Doing this could help you understand and fulfil all her expectations!

Admit, Learn from and do not Repeat your Mistakes

It is simple mistakes that ruin your relationship. It doesn’t hurt to admit your mistakes and improve upon them. She would appreciate your honesty and the effort you take to correct your mistakes.

Attract your Ex-girlfriend

It is your personality and attitude that matters the most and decides if you are attractive. Nurture and project all the qualities that she used to like in you. The past breakup should not make you less confident about your chances and ability to make her fall for you. Women like men who have confidence and self-esteem.

Avoid Contact while she is Dating someone else

Trying to contact her is a thought you should surely stay far away from. She will surely be thinking a lot about you and it would make her wonder why you aren’t trying to contact her. This curiosity would in the end get the better of her and work in your favour.

Live your Life and Do Not Sulk

Try and get back to your normal life as soon as possible. Pick up some new hobbies, make new friends and go ahead with your life. A guy who springs back into a lively life so fast is always attractive! And no brownie points for guessing that a sulky guy isn’t.

And last but not the least – Win her back, but never by losing your Self-Respect

You can do everything mentioned above to get back your girl but do not lose your self-respect while doing so! Never beg or plead her to take you back. A guy with no self-respect is never attractive! You would end up making yourself look like a needy loser! If you do not respect yourself, your girl wouldn’t too!

Be yourself and do not Try Too Hard

The bottom-line is that you have to be an even better version of the person she was once in love with. Most importantly, be the guy she fell in love with and not the guy she broke up with!


Anna Perkins is a relationship writer who offers her own forthright opinion over the worlds of dating, romance, relationships , marriage and friendships. She loves cats, traveling, spending time with her son and husband.


  1. Matthew Savageau Reply

    well i dont really know where to start about my issue. if were to start from the beginning it would take to long. so short version for now unless you are interested in hearing the rest later. i really need some advice i cannot stop thinking about my ex girlfriend. it has been 7 months since she moved out of my house and left me. since then she has not made any contact with me unless i sent something to her first. and even then with many attempts of writing her the only response i got from her 3 months ago was to leave her alone. she blocked me from Facebook, and blocked my cell number at one point not sure if i am still blocked on her phone. i am in love with her and i want to marry her at one point i mean before the breakup and everything went down hill. so i have no idea how long she has known her current boyfriend i know this and that is they just became friends on facebook at the beginning of the month and now as of the 12th she is in a relationship with this other guy.

  2. It’s been 3 months since I caught my ex with another guy I love her and miss her Her name is Alma born 7/7/70 my name is Sean born 7/4 /67. I said some bad words to her when it happened but she never officially Brok up with me I walked in and found her with a guy I love her and her children will she come back.

  3. Valentin Diaz Reply

    I dated this girl for 4 years I ended up doing 10 months in jail I was her man she was my woman we have started to try to do a new life and the stress got so hard for her that she took my ring off I love her with all my heart and I want her back on the 7th month I was in jail I asked her if she was dating someone she said yes a month went by and I asked her are you sleeping with him and she confessed yes I know that she wasn’t with me technically but I wanted her to be there for me when I got out we’re going to start a new life before I went in I felt betrayed but I understand that she was lonely I’m trying to win her back and I’m trying to tell her and explain to her what I feel for her but it seems to be not working she says she loves me and she cares for me very much and she doesn’t want me out of her life and I know she has a problem with commitment what do I do she’s the girl of my dreams I asked her not to see me no more after she told me that but she kept coming back to visit I asked her what are you doing here you’re with another guy and she said I miss you I wanted to see you and I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to be here how do what what do I think about that please help me I want th I want to be with this woman the rest of my life

  4. I dated my ex for three years. We were very close and best friends. I did not like the area that we lived abd wanted to relocate which she didn’t. I ended up leaving her while still in love with her. I moved to Asia but soon missed her. I eventually poured my heart out to her and offered marriage no matter where we lived. I recently found out that she is dating someone else. I haven’t seen her in five months and we work together. Last time we spoke I restated the fat that I wanted to start a life with her. My plan is to live my life and work on me, hopefully this rebound won’t last. But realistically how probable is it that she will want me back?

  5. Olatunji Aderele Mason Reply

    i recently started having feelings for a lady that I dated almost 2 years ago in the summer of 2015. She was was a close relative of one of my in laws!!! When we dated, she had plans to settle down and get married. I definitely wanted to marry her, but I wanted to take it step by step. Things started off lovely at first. She invited me to invited me to her church.

    We went boat ride to get together, then we went to the an amusement park afterwards. Things were good up until the end of summer about some of about some issues from she’s had coming from other family members which is hard for me to explain. We both were on social media.

    Then one day she noticed that about of a bunch of porn was posted on my page and she grew discussed. I tried to explain to her that I would handle this issue and block those people posted that stuff which I did. But she still was not going for that. She had me unfriend all her friends and family on social media which I do didn’t want to do.

    She has some relatives we were friends we with on social media before we even hooked up and started dating. I’d share the interesting things and post some comments there page and some how she still get offended although they weren’t negative. Let me remind you that when we dated, this a a lady that did not have much. Plus she was single mom. Plus she’s very spiritual too. She goes to church alot and she always keeps me in her prayers.

    After a couple months go by of little communication, we she informs me she’s a got a good career, a nice house, and working on getting the rest of her furniture which I assume she already has by now. Then she changes her profile a little to where I know longer have her as a friend but I can still follow heri

    Just recently an immediate family member of mind become ill two months ago. who is now recovery and receiving physical therapy the person was in a rehabilitation center, one even she called out of the blue and left a voicemail on my home phone. The did something to me there. That’s when I started to miss her and develop feelings for again but I just did not know where to start.

    I called her on social media and did a video chat with her a day after I got the voice mail while I was at the Rehab with one of my family members. Just the sound of voice had me thinking about her so much that I began to chat online with her here and there wondering how things in her life are.

    This weekend that pasted, there was huge event for one another my relatives that graduated rom high school. I wanted to attend which could because I was taking care of my immediate relative that was ill and was working on getting better.

    I was hoping and praying that she would be there, so we could do a live video chat but she had a hectic schedule and she could not make it for she had to take part in another function which she helped organize. One the day of the function we were texting. Then all of a sudden she’s says “My boyfriend is calling me now”!! I’ll chat with you later. That’s when I froze and I went into panic mode. I said” Ooh my goodness !! I can’t believe what I just heard. I cannot believe what I just heard”. Please tell me she’s joking!!

    The rest of the night I was so depressed which I really should be due to the fact that It’s been almost 2 years since we dated but I wanted to reconnect with her and see if I can could be in a relationship. Then even perhaps taking her up on that offer and consider marrying her but making sure I well prepared with any necessary legal documentation in case something happens were it doesn’t work out and we file for a divorce, I don’t suffer and she won’t suffer also.

    That night a went a to reggae night club trying to take mind mind off things, and help me feel better yet the depression would not disappear. Therefore I just kept praying and praying and asking the most high to help me get her back in to my life again. She made me feel good. She raised my self of steem and my confidence. I felt like a lucky guy to have her.

    When first met her I was in my early 20’s and I did not start dating her until I was in my late 30’s!

    Now with sites like love dignity. It’s helping me cope with my issue and guiding me with proper steps.

    • Anna Fleszer Reply

      Thanks for your inspiring comment Olatunji. Don’t give up! There is a good chance you will both end up together. Just keep trying and push harder.

  6. I dated a girl for the past 2.5 years. We were our first everything. We became toxic due to not knowing how to be in a relationship. We constantly talked about marriage and our future. We had the most love and passion for eachother but lead ourselves in to constant break ups. We always got back together after a couple of days though. However, we had a falling out that lasted a few weeks with no communication. I decided to try again with her but was very cautious the whole time. We actually got to a really great place. But she dropped the bomb on me that her and her family were moving from California to Texas. She wanted me to come but I was scared. She moved and I had a plane trip to visit in 6 weeks. After 2 weeks she ended things completely at random and got a new boyfriend he same day. She got very hateful/hurtful to me and said very mean things to get to me. I haven’t seen her since we were still together. She has been with this new guy for three months now. She is only 21 and going through a rough stage of her life I.e. not doing well in school, falling out of church, drinking, etc. Her new boyfriend is “completely opposite of me” and “says the right things”. I still love her to death. I would do anything to be back with her. I made MANY mistakes. (There was never any infidelity, only lack of communication and reciprocation). Last time I talked to her she said she was going to marry this guy. It just all seems so fast and very unlike her. What can I do to get another chance? Would you consider this guy a rebound, even after three months?

  7. Hello, I would really appreciate some insight and advice….

    My girlfriend and I (both 20 years old) mutually split up during the end of this past August (starting our 3rd years’ of college at different colleges), after dating for over 2 and a half years. Our relationship was amazing. We never really fought(when we did they were small stupid fights like about movies and dumb stuff like that), we connected on so many levels except sexually. …I definitely have madonna whore-complex, which especially made things tougher for her over the last year of our relationship especially. But we have had numerous discussions about us getting married and being together in the future with each other in all seriousness. We both knew it was going to happen. We just clicked… whenever we are together, it was just perfect. We were no doubtedly each other’s best friends. We told each other everything and got each other through anything going on in each other’s lives.
    So about 2 years of our relationship has been long distance as we attend different colleges and dont really see each other aside from winter break, summer break, etc. The distance has ALWAYS been tougher for her as she desires someone to be there for her at all times , and sometimes it can be difficult for me to 100% give her what she wants…. you get it…. it’s long distance stuff with an emotional girlfriend…. Anyways, I always missed her while we were at school but I just wasn’t as emotional as her… Also the sexual aspect of our relationship definitely decreased over time while we were at school because of me. I just felt less willing to have those “dirty talks” and take those “naughty pics” and she expressed to me that she needed that more in our relationship, but I knew the madonna-complex was just making it a little uncomfortable for me… FYI, My girlfriend and I never discussed anything about me having the madonna-complex, because I didn’t do the research until after we split-up. So it was just kindve confusing for the both of us…

    Anyways, last April I met some girl at a track meet, and was just being nice…. we ended up spending a decent amount of time together that weekend at the track meet… I was very curious about her…. anyways over the next month(April and May) we texted and snap chatted somewhat regularly… (enough to keep me curious and interested). Anyways she told me that she really likes me and to be honest I thought she was attractive and wanted to get to know her more…. no cheating happened…, though we did spend some one-on-one time….. this was all unknown to my girlfriend.

    So, when college ended in late May, I was back with my girlfriend, but the whole summer I was just kept curious about the girl I met at college…. and I still snap chatted her occasionally and texted occasionally…. enough to keep the curiousity in my head. Anyways, the girl had posted a harmless picture of the 2 of us at the beach (it was a track party so the whole team was there), and my girlfriend was NOT happy at all…. so after that she kindve knew something was up…. anyways my girlfriend spent the whole summer going out of her way for me constantly and doing all sorts of nice things…. it seemed like she was trying to win me over…. and for some reason this made feel almost less attracted to her if that makes sense? I was still so curious about the girl from college… However my girlfriend and I still hung out all summer and that connection was definitely still there and I enjoyed every single second of being in her company…. but in the back of my mind I was just so curious about the college girl….. Now towards the beginning of summer I had talked to people about possibly breaking up with my girlfriend to explore my curiosities with the college girl…. however I didn’t have the heart, even though I probably should have…. but again my girlfriend was my best friend and I enjoyed everything we did together that summer and so did she….Again… she spent that whole summer trying to win me over with cute notes, little gifts, voicemails, etc….

    So summer winds down and we are ready to go back to college, again I was going to suggest to her that we take a “break” for fall upcoming semester but I didn’t have the heart… she is the sweetest soul on this earth and it would have crushed her after spending that entire summer trying to win me back….
    anyways, I started my semester before she did, however she had a week of training for her new job at her college while I was headed to my college to start the semester… so she went back to school a few days before I did (because of her job training). About a week into the semester, she hits me with the “we need to talk” text. So we Skype and she suggested we take a “break” … I was so confused at the time, but also relieved because that was kindve what I wanted… but she was the one suggesting it.
    It was a little tough for me at first, but I knew I could pursue the track girl I met at college during the previous semester, and that’s exactly what I did. As you could imagine, it didn’t work out, and I really tried to make it work with her, because I don’t like to be alone. But as attractive as she was, there was no comparison to my now “ex girlfriend ” who I had been spoiled by for 2.5 years. I went out of my comfort zone with meeting girls and trying new things this whole semester, and towards the ending of October I literally had an epiphany….

    I knew that I needed my girlfriend back. Not a doubt in my mind…. suddenly all the curiosities of being with other girls were gone, and all I cared about was getting her back….. However, I learned that she started seeing another guy at her college since the beginning of September… this crushed me… seeing her with another guy was the worst possible thing for me. She had been keeping it quiet on social media, but then I saw a picture and unfollowed her from all social media immediately to prevent myself from being hurt.
    But basically we hadn’t had a legit conversation or even seen each other since we mutually split-up during the last week of August, up until This past Thanksgiving where we both knew we would be back home in close proximity( aside from one phone call in early September to catch up).
    Anyways, after I had my “epiphany” there were so many thoughts flying trough my mind…. so I wrote them all down….. ended up being about 12 pages front and back of notebook paper. I had written this letter specifically intended so that my ex girlfriend could read it when we finally met up…. basically expressing my feelings during that past summer when I was curious about the girl I met in college and my journey through the first few months of the fall semester.
    I wrote the letter not holding back anything… I told her I wanted her back and that I was sure that me and her were meant to be together, I recalled past happy memories, I brought up the fact that I have the madonna whore-complex, and a whole bunch of other personal, relationship stuff…. I also didn’t know how she was going to respond to reading the letter, because it was A LOT… and I didn’t know anything about the new relationship she was in…. so anyways we met up this past Wednesday, we caught up, and I gave her the letter…. turns out she is in a pretty serious relationship with this guy, and the letter I had worked on for nearly a month seemed to not affect her too much. We talked a little after she read it, and she just basically said that the letter came too late, and that she needed the letter of assurance before summer ended…. so at this point I feel absolutely crushed… but I kept my cool, as I am not an emotional guy…

    My thinking is that I obviously didn’t treat her right over the summer because I was curious about the girl I met at college. It’s not like I was mean to her or anything like that, but she knew something was up… I wasn’t my normal self all the time…. anyways my thinking is that when she went back to college, she had an emptiness obviously because of me not being 100% there, and she filled that empty void with this dude she met at her job training at college. Anyways, it just sucked to hear her say she was in a serious relationship, and it just confused me because that summer she spent so much energy on trying to win me back, and sending me assuring notes and voicemails,etc…. I just don’t understand how she can suddenly forget all of that and get into a relationship nearly a week after we split up. I’m just so confused right now and do not know what to do…. she said she needs to give her new relationship a chance…. but again this girl is the kindest, most sweet soul on earth…. I know the kindve person she is, and that is a long-term relationship person…. especially is she said it’s serious…. I just don’t know what to do at this point, and it’s getting even more difficult because obviously when we dated, we texted and called everyday especially while we were away at college, that’s how I got through my days. And again, we were each other’s BEST friends… so in a situation like this, I really don’t have anyone else I feel 100% comfortable to talk to on a day-to-day basis to help me get through a situation like this or give me advice. I can’t express how much it sucks to think of her as just a “friend” to me and I do not want that to be the case….. the weird thing is, while I was curious about that girl I met in college, I thought maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad thing if she was just my friend…. but it’s crazy how things have changed….. it’s almost like our positions have completely changed between the summer and now.
    Again, as of right now I am 100% sure that my ex is the girl I want, and I can’t see a future without her being my partner. This is all stuff I told her in that letter too… so she knows how I feel. She probably thinks I sound so desperate.
    But this girl doesn’t have a bad bone in her body, so she is being all nice to me and actually took the letter back to her house for a few days to read it over again, but it just sucks because I don’t want her to treat me as her “friend”, so I’ve been trying to kindve be slightly passive aggressive over text over the past few days. I told her I still have a few things I want to tell her( which is basically just my reflection from when we finally saw each other and the past few days). But she is being like way too nice about it…. it almost feels like it’s just pity… which sucksssss. I just don’t know how to go about this situation man…. I know this is a long ass story but I would really appreciate any feedback… thanks a lot.

    • So I started reading your question when I realized it smelt like burning toast. Putting my tablet in my nightstand drawer, I went to the kitchen and to my horror, the toaster oven had caught fire! After several attempts to put the fire out, it started burning uncontrollably and the curtains caught fire. In a panic, I dialled 911 but the it was too late. I was trapped!
      Blackness ensued.
      When I came to, a handsome firefighter loomed over me. Did I die? Am I in heaven?
      “who are you??” I asked, in a frenzie.
      “you’re going to be okay. I’m Dave, I rescued you from a housefire. You’re very lucky we got there in time”
      I sighed with relief. I was alive! All my future goals could still come to fruition.
      Suddenly, fear sunk in. Upon leaving the hospital, where would I go? I had no insurance, no money and nowhere to live afterwards. I’d moved across country from all of my family. It was to my pure luck, that once again, Dave saved me.
      He invited me into his home with his wife. She was short and sweet, but very feisty with severe alcoholism. Dave didn’t deserve the psychological abuse he endured on her nightly blackouts and morning hangovers. I realized that my hero was suffering. I tried consoling him, helping care for his wife.
      It was not but weeks later when she landed in jail for crashing her Mercedes into a busy shopping centre. Throughout her sentence, I stayed with Dave and eventually, a friendship formed, which eventually blossomed into a full blown affair. It wasn’t much longer when the divorce papers were sent to his wife’s cell, and Dave and I rebuilt my old home into a Haven.
      Years passed, we got married but had no children. It was a personal choice. I myself, secretly liked going into my nightstand before bed and read the same romance novel that put me right to sleep, everytime. Having children would’ve distracted us from what we really wanted in life, which was spending time together and for me, I enjoyed trying to finish the same novel I had started on the day of the housefire. It reminded me of how simple life was before loving another before yourself.
      It is with deep regret that is took me 30 years of trying to finish this novel every night, before I realized that it was simply a question on this forum. Unfortunately, I have never finished reading it over these 30 years, but I thank you for giving me quality bedtime reading material that always puts me straight to a deep slumber.

  8. Dave Moore Reply

    This is hard for me to say but me and my ex had an amazing relationship she is 12 years older than me we have broken up several times through out our 10 months she is the only person who I can say saved my life she had a heart attack a week before her birthday and I was by her side she left me late Sept kicked me out with no explanation a week later I had owed rent to her I called her she said she has been done with me for a month prior to this and I was devastated then she got with another guy about 3 days after she kicked me out of her life I doubt she will ever get with me again I want to give up cause i can’t feel my heart beating good lost it’s taste and i can’t sleep i know that the time we were together she said she was happy i know i was I want her back

  9. Well I would like some advice also!
    Me and my girl were friends and she came in my life 2 weeks after my ex broke up with me. She saw me be upset about ex but even worse she saw my mental health turn badly. She seen me drink bottles a night to hide my emotions, take anxiety pills, isolate myself from the world, but she was always there! Honestly she reminded me of a love I thought didn’t exist anymore. And because of this I ran from her. But we’re and we’re always together so more and more feelings happened for us both even though I was subcounciosly running from her. So I started living with my coworker, girl who I ran to, while I was waiting on my new job. This made my girl furious, again we were still just friends. We never told each other our feelings. But regardless something clicked in my head and I started chasing her now instead of running and comepletely changed around October! Well I moved cities for my new job and she would come visit or I would go there and it was ok, but she told me that she was going to give this new guy a chance and I couldn’t understand why. Knew that he had tried a few times in the last but was unsuccessful. Fast forward to now me and her had numerous great conversations just talking about all the memories we have and love we have for each other still. Can even still see the future we want with each other but she’s still gonna give the new guy a fair shot which is why we gotta stop talking for a while! What do I do?! I love her and if I get her back she’ll be my wife! But just hurting right now and just trying to stay focus and work on myself for whenever she comes back!!

  10. Please I need your help here,I have been dating this girl for 3years now we broke up multiple times and get back together again but this time we had a misunderstanding and she said its over,when I tried to fight for her love she said she has move on with someone she has been dating for 6months while she was still with me but she still care about me,she said we should be friends I don’t know what to do cause I still love her please help me

  11. I have been single all my life till the present 25 years old. Thn one day i met this guy, at first i didnt have feelings for him, but with time my love for him grew.He chased me for almost 10 months, but i told him i wasnt ready. I was so used to my single life and i wanted something real and not Just to have Sex and the next moment you break Up. For those 10 months while he was pursing me, i was observing him. He lived a different lifestyle, i don’t drink nor of an outgoing type. He used to go Out with his friends a lot,drink etc but he never really made any effort when it came to me. i was confused as to why his words didnt match Up with action, he used to tell me he loved me so much & that i was that one girl who changed his life to better. Eventhough we werent dating,i cared so much for him and Loved him unconditionally without expecting anything from him.

    One day he tried Kissing me after several attempts while i told him not to & that day when he tried to, i gave him a slap coz i told him not to & he crossed the Line of my boundry. Thn one day i finally kissed him & he became the first guy i kissed in my life. Still he was not making any effort,it was always Just me trying to get to know him & so fourth. He will rather Post pictures of Ladies on his whatsup Status but Not a single photo of me. It pained me! I would do anything for this guy, but he could jst not See it. For 25 years, Out of all the guys who proposed me, i opened Up my heart to him & he Just couldn’t See it.

    One day i told him that i didnt want Sex to be Part of a relationship, i am still a virgin and that If he wanted Sex i wouldnt jst giv it to him like tht coz i belivd in Sex after marriage & If that doesnt work out he needs to understand & b patient til i was ready to giv him sex. He failed to understand & still was jst insisting. One day i got tired of his behaviour, Not treating me right or even trying. I was th one trying everytime. I got tired thn one day i told him WE should Just forget this love existed, tht i dnt thnk this will work out, tht i lived a different lifestyle & his was diff, tht he wntd Sex & i didnt. I tld hm it was selfish for me to drag him along while i couldn’t satisfy him, tht WE both deservd better & th best & wishd hm Well.

    After tht he didnt even comment,He was jst silent. He didnt event Fight for this lov or cud have said His willing to wait Till I was ready. I assumed he only wanted sex & i cudnt giv it to him.So i started focusing on myself bettering myself, booking for driving school & so fourth. After few weeks i hear his dating a girl in another town,i was so dissapointed & hurt becz i kept on asking myself where was this new Girl th whole time? He started seeing her while he was still wth me or?? So many questions ran in my head. I learned to mov on & i hope th best for hm & hop his happy. Some friends of His stil says he still lov me coz i was th Girl WHO came into his life & changed his life to a better man. I still miss him & love him so much unconditionally. I Made a No contact with him ever since the day i told him to end everything.

    I Just Wish he could jst realize that i truly loved him & all i wanted was Just Love & affection which He never gave me. I jst wish he cud turn bck &learn His mistakes and ask for another chance coz am willing to take him back. But i realise its too late. He löst a good woman & i Hope one day He will come to His Sense.

  12. I am the most happiest woman on earth right now, My fiancee that left me few months ago just came back to me last night crying to take him back. Guess what??

  13. My highest surprise is that he just proposed to me right now and a car as a sign of apology. He left me because his ex wife took him back even after they have divorced.

  14. Ronald J Maier Reply

    I wished I would have read your column first before I did stupid things like crying and begging her back ….I broke up with her and told her that I was gonna start the new year without her…..because I didnt like the ways she was treating me….so I assumed that she would apologize and come back….but instead she ended things, met someone in under a week on a dating site, and says she starting over fresh…

    I cried and begged and only wanted a chance to learn from my past mistakes….and I kept being so persistent calling and texting that now she has me blocked and changed her number….

    However, during the time I was apologizing , she led me to believe that everything was my fault, and in the process, kept playing mind games with me, saying she still loved me and we would work things out…she did this torture to me for the next 4 days, while seeing the other guy….misleading me, giving me false hopes…..she kept changing her mind over and over… the last time she asked me if I wanted to try again, I thought she was trying to mess with my head and heart again , so I said NO, I dont trust you since u could so easily go to another man and the ways you have played with my heart the last 4 days with your games….it is shear torture…..
    But after I said no, the next day my head was of course wondering why she was asking if I wanted to try again?
    So I kept trying to call a blocked number until she finally changed it…..

    I made that mistake because she kept playing with my head….torture!
    But now I wish I would have accepted her first answer when I found out about them instead of listening to her keep saying how much she loves me and wants to work things out for those 4 days

    We were together for a year on weekends because of the distance

    Is there any hope now, since she changed her number and seeing some rebound?

  15. I started reading his works and testimonies and I was so encouraged to fight for my marriage through his power and work. There were times were I lost hope, thinking of giving up but he reminds me to never lose hope. I should take the chance to get my family back on track with reunion love spell. Today I can say my marriage has been restored. Am proud showing my appreciation to ADU

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