If you’re reading this article, then I’m guessing you’re on a mission to get your ex boyfriend back. Other sections of this website will examine how to get back an ex boyfriend, but this article will specifically focus on 5 common mistakes that women make after a breakup.

Mistake #1: Crying & Begging Your Ex To Take You Back

This is one of the hardest things to avoid in the immediate aftermath of a breakup. Your ex boyfriend may have dumped you outright, or you may have gone your separate ways as the result of a fight…. regardless of the circumstances, you absolutely should not cry, beg, or seem desperate.

At this stage, controlling your emotions is key. When you’re alone in the privacy of your own home, you can cry as long as you want… but the last thing you want to do after splitting with your ex boyfriend is beg or seem desperate.

Mistake #2: Seek Closure, Answers, and Forgiveness

First of all, your goal is to get back together with your ex boyfriend, not find closure. If all of your attempts to win back your ex have failed, then you can consider seeking answers and closure… but for now, in the first month or two after breaking up, you shouldn’t try to find out why your ex boyfriend broke up with you or what you could’ve done differently.

You may think that your ex boyfriends reasons for breaking up are complete crap, but don’t fight him over it. Just accept that as of right now, you are no longer together, and no amount of ‘answers’ will change that.

Mistake #3: Seeming Desperate to Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back

OK, so you probably are feeling desperate to win your ex back… but no matter what, you can’t show that desperation around your ex. If he knows you’re wanting to get back together – and if he thinks that you’re still very attached to him – it’s not going to help your cause.

Your ex boyfriend will be able to tell if you’re desperate, so you need to disguise these feelings as much as possible. It’s also very easy to take advantage of someone who is feeling desperate, and you don’t want to give him that option.

Mistake #4: Setting Deadlines or ‘Threatening’ Your Ex

If you try to set a deadline or give an ultimatum to your ex, it’s only going to make things worse. For example, if you tell him you want to know within a week whether he thinks the two of you will ever get back together, then he’ll just be further convinced that he made the correct decision to break up with you in the first place.

Any form of ultimatum or deadline you impose is a farce anyway (after all, your ex is the one who is resisting getting back together!)… and chances are very good that he’ll call your bluff and you’ll end up looking foolish and even more desperate.

Mistake #5: Sending the Wrong Text Messages to Your Ex

Texting can be an extremely effective method of rekindling romance and rebuilding attraction with your ex… but only if you know what you’re doing! Most women send text messages that are completely counterproductive, which pushes their ex boyfriend further away.

If you want to learn how to harness the power of text messages in getting back your ex, check out my review of Text Your Ex Back by Michael Fiore.


Anna Perkins is a relationship writer who offers her own forthright opinion over the worlds of dating, romance, relationships , marriage and friendships. She loves cats, traveling, spending time with her son and husband.

1 Comment

  1. I think one of the most common mistake had been left out, so I just leave it there, Tom. 😀

    Mistake #6: Becoming friends after break-up

    It’s a very common situation. You have been together for a long time and you feel that he is the only one who understands you, and you just don’t want to lose his emotional support.
    Becoming friends after the relationship leads to nowhere, trust me. He must feel that he needs you and there is no way being with you, but in a relationship. It might be hard, cutting everything that connects you to him, but keep in mind that you want him to miss you. In case you can’t stand texting him, just delete his number and unfollow on social media. You will even feel better.

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