If you are afraid to even broach the subject of marriage with your partner, there are some great questions to make it easier. Discussing the topic of marriage doesn’t have to be difficult or awkward. In fact, it is important to ask certain questions before taking the plunge with the person you are dating. In this article we will list off some of the best things to ask when you are trying to talk about tying the knot.

1. How do you feel about having kids?
Most people get married before deciding to have kids, but this is still a good question to ask the person you want to marry. It is crucial that you find out whether or not you are both on the same page. Surprisingly, a lot of couples discuss this subject very little if at all before getting married.

2. Do you want a wedding ceremony?
While many couples spend thousands of dollars on a beautiful wedding ceremony, others are satisfied with taking a simpler (and cheaper) route. You might want to consider asking your partner what they think about this before you start making any plans in your mind.

3. What will the Reception be like?
You might want to have a small wedding reception with a limited guest list, while your partner wants a big celebration. This is yet another thing that you should talk about with each other.

4. How are we doing Financially?
It’s not the best idea to get married to someone if neither of you are financially solid. If the topic of marriage is in the air, this is a question that is definitely worth asking. A lot of people don’t like talking about their finances, but it’s important that you both open up to each other about it.

5. Where Would You Like to Settle Down?
If you partner has at least some idea about where they want to end up settling down, you’ll want to know about it. They might want to put down roots in a completely different part of the country, or even live abroad. If there is a conflict with this, you’ll most likely have problems down the road.

6. What do you think Makes a good Marriage?
Before you decide to get married to the person you’re with, you’ll want to know what they consider to be a good marriage. There’s always a chance that you won’t see eye to eye on this. People have different ideas about what constitutes a thriving marriage, so you shouldn’t shy away from this question.

7. Will we share a Bank Account?
Marriage is all about two people becoming one, at least metaphorically. But some couples decide to keep separate bank accounts even after tying the knot. It’s always a good idea to clarify this with your partner before walking down the aisle.

8. How will the chores at Home be divided?
It’s also going to be helpful to figure out who is going to do what in terms of chores at home before getting married. Some people absolutely detest doing the dishes, but they have no problem vacuuming and dusting. You’ll need to figure out the division of labor early on.

9. Can You See Us Together 20 Years from Now?
Marriage is obviously a huge commitment, so you’ll need to make sure that the person you get married to is in it for the long haul. You might also want to ask them if they will remain with you even if you become seriously ill.

10. Will You Always Put Our Relationship First?
Priorities are always important when it comes to maintaining a successful marriage over time. You’ll therefore need to make certain that they will never put anything before your relationship no matter what.

11. How Do You Feel About Monogamy?
Monogamy has been a traditional concept in our society for a long time now, but it doesn’t completely sit well with everyone. Men in particular can be uncomfortable foregoing all others for the rest of their life.

12. What is Your Relationship with your Family like?
Getting married means having in-laws, so you’ll want to know what your partner’s relationship is like with their family. This can have a surprisingly big impact on almost any marriage.

13. Is it Important that I share your Religious Beliefs?
If you know that your partner practices a particular religion, this could be a point of contention after marriage. You should find out if they want or expect you to participate in their religion once married.

14. What do see your life being like in 5 years?
This question can give you a helpful glimpse into their vision for the future. If you don’t share the same vision, you might not be well-suited as lifelong partners.

15. How do you handle conflict in a relationship?
Every married couple has to deal with conflict, and it’s important to know how your partner will deal with it. You should have similar methods for resolving and dealing with problems that come up.

16. What Would You Try to Keep the Romance Alive?
You should know what your partner might be willing to try to keep the romance going for the sake of your marriage.

17. How do You Feel about Divorce?
While this can be a touchy subject, it is one you might want to address. The person you are with should want to do everything possible to avoid divorce.

18. What are Some of Your Fears about Marriage?
It is perfectly normal to have certain fears or reservations concerning marriage. You’ll want to discuss these fears before making the decision to get married.

19. What do you Consider to be Infidelity?
Not everyone has the exact same definition of infidelity, so you’ll want to discuss what you feel is inappropriate behavior as a married couple.

20. What Would Your Wedding Vows be like?
This question can tell you a lot about what your partner values in a marriage.


It is important to remind yourself just how big a deal getting married really is. When you sit down and ask each other these questions, you will get a better idea of your compatibility as a couple. You don’t want to make such a big commitment only to find out that it was a huge mistake to begin with.


Anna Perkins is a relationship writer who offers her own forthright opinion over the worlds of dating, romance, relationships , marriage and friendships. She loves cats, traveling, spending time with her son and husband.

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