There are some things you should never say to your ex boyfriend. A lot of women have been emailing me and asking what they should do or say to get their ex boyfriend back into their life again.

I can tell you confidently that if you’re not sure about what to say, then as of right now, don’t say anything at all to him. You don’t know if what you’re saying will actually be the nail in the metaphorical coffin.

To help you out, here are 10 things you should never say to your ex boyfriend.

1.) “I miss you.”
Chances are he was the one that ended it with you, and now you want him back. Right now, he doesn’t miss you… he’s happy that you two have moved on. By saying you miss him, you’re letting him know that you want to get back together with him. While you may think this is a sweet gesture, it’s psychologically proven that saying “I miss you” to your ex boyfriend will only push him further away.

2.) “I love you still.”
… or anything along the lines of this is off limits. Again, just like “I miss you,” you’re showing too much interest right now. What you need to be doing is pushing your ex further away — not telling him you still love or asking if he still loves you. Only then will he start reacting in a positive way.

3.) “Can we at least be friends?”
Think about this for a minute… right now, do you think this is a good idea? You don’t want to be friends with him right now. You want him to be your boyfriend again. Even if, right now, he does agree to see you again, all you’ll be thinking is how much you want him. This just isn’t a good idea.

4.) “I’m lonely and depressed… and haven’t eaten in days!”
Crying out for him is definitely not going to do you any good. Remember, men are attracted to high valued females. By saying you’re lonely and depressed (or anything along the lines of that) you’re telling him that you’re not of high value. You need to stop communicating with him for now and get yourself back on track before you do anything else.

5.) “I never should have dated you.”
A lot of women will lash out in anger at their ex boyfriends for making them feel abandoned. Again, this won’t help you get your ex boyfriend back. Men do not appreciate be lashed out at, especially if he really hasn’t done anything wrong to begin with.

If you do feel angry at him, take it out on something else… go exercise (a great way to relieve anger) or engage in another activity until the feeling subsides. This will help you not hurt him so much.

6.) “I’m dating this new guy and he’s way better than you.”
Trying to illicit a jealous response from him in this manner will only make him resent you. Yes, while I state that in my other articles that making him jealous is a good thing, if you do it so obviously and incorrectly, it can have the opposite affect and may destroy your relationship at the end.

7.) “I’m deleting your from my Facebook and from my life.”
By saying this, you’re telling him that his very thought is causing so much disturbance that you’re wanting to just eliminate him from your life. While isolating yourself from him after the breakup is very important, you shouldn’t be making it obvious that you’re doing so otherwise he’ll begin to resent you.

8.) “I hated how you treated me.”
A lot of women will want to say this to their ex boyfriends. Again, this is an angry response and you should avoid this at all costs.

9.) “You broke my heart.”
Again, letting him know that he had this affect on you is like giving him the keys to your life. If you say this to him, you just gave him full control of you.

10.) “Never talk to me ever again!”
Again, if you say this to your boyfriend and he has no interest for you, he’ll just never want to talk to you again. After your break up, you shouldn’t be talking to your ex boyfriend at all for a certain period of time, but you shouldn’t lash out at him and tell him this outright in an angry fashion. You need to tell him kindly and politely that you don’t feel like talking to him.


Anna Perkins is a relationship writer who offers her own forthright opinion over the worlds of dating, romance, relationships , marriage and friendships. She loves cats, traveling, spending time with her son and husband.

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