I’ve always found it strange that many of my single friends feel threatened to live the single life. I don’t understand it, because I notice that they choose another time wasting idiot, and weeks later, wonder why they have no success in love! Weeks into the relationship, my girlfriends will moan that he is another bad boy who will break her heart.
This is the trouble when we do not give the heart time to heal. We worry that we will be alone forever, deep insecure thoughts rear their ugly head, and we slip back into a shell.
It is healthy to mourn, but many of us still believe that it is weak to display such emotional vulnerability fearing that any man in our life will then run a mile! I say balls to that!
Ah the trouble of the sexes!
I’ve noticed that many of my friends seem quite desperate when they are without a partner. Societal peer pressure can make us feel the need to be in a relationship, even if it doesn’t make us feel happy. But that contravenes the reason we want to seek and fall in love.
We may not want to admit it, but most of us want to find a partner who will see the beauty in us even after a bad nights sleep where bags and haggard looks previal. After all why should we have to wear a mask to gain acceptance? This just adds extra pressure to our self doubt, and if you don’t believe that you are beautiful inside and out, maybe it’s time to take a step back and use the single life as a step toward self-love. True beauty is within, and your partner should not mind whether you’ve gained a few pounds… or forgotten to shave your legs for that matter!
Talking of peer pressure to conform, one member of my family mocked me for being single for a couple of years, before I met my husband. She wanted me to meet a rich city guy, but she didn’t mention anything about him making me happy. Money is not the source of happiness. Sure, it can make us feel secure, but what is the point in meeting a prince charming if there is no real connection?
All relationships, including friendship and marriage, can be hard work. My husband and I are in our fifteenth year of marriage, and we have experienced a mixture of happiness, sadness, and insecurity, but the strengths of any relationship are trust, commitment, communication and unconditional love. When you find the person who can share all that with you’ve met your one. Until then enjoy being you and embrace the single life, warts and all!
Happy new year all!