17 Oct 2012

5 Signs It’s Time To Leave Your Relationship

1 Comment Featured Articles, Marriage Proposals

When a relationship is in trouble it can be hard to re-establish empathy and reach a mutual understanding. It could be that one half of the couple has cheated, and the other half can’t let go. Most of the time, if the relationship has lost its communication, it’s time to visit a professional counsellor in order to determine whether the signs it’s time to leave your relationship are real and if they can be repaired.

I’m in a happy relationship with my husband, but we work hard on our marriage and visit a counsellor once a month to work through any issues. I know how hard it can be to build a successful marriage or relationship.

I remember the time when we were low on finances. My husband’s manager had called him into the office and told him that his hours would be cut from 45 to 25. I had just finished my degree and didn’t have enough clients to bring in a substantial income. As a result, he grew tired and depressed. He lost his libido and closed up, unable to communicate his worries. I’m a great believer in romance, which is why my husband and I have consistently dined out once a week since our first meet 21 years ago. It took five months of marriage counselling for him to confess that he felt a failure, but I reassured him that what happened was through no fault of his own. Since his confession, our relationship has gained in strength. He found another job, and he’s spending more one on one time with our three children. If you are considering counselling in your relationship, see these tips on how counselling can improve your marriage.

When someone’s emotional state is bordering on depression it is natural for them to be hesitant to open up; they believe that counselling of any kind will be of no help. Often a partner has been closed up for so long, and the other half is desperate to resolve the situation. It can take a while for them to recognize that a successful relationship envelops joy, security and a strong bond. It feels like no one can break you apart when you feel blissfully happy.

break up

There are tell-tale signs. You only have to listen to your heart to know if the relationship is a success of a failure. Many couples have given it their all, but there is nothing more to give. Here are five warning signs that it’s time to leave your relationship:

Lack Of Communication

All couples need to engage in order to a build a solid relationship based on mutual respect. There is no point in one partner having dominance over all decisions. Good communication takes effort, and if there is no effort from your partner then it may be time to end your relationship.

Resentment Towards Your Partner

It can be difficult for some couples to overcome betrayal. If one partner has cheated, and the other partner has accepted the fact and moved on, the mistrust could still be lurking ready to fire during a dispute.

No effort

Successful relationships do not come easy; they require subsequent effort. This includes romance, sex, communication, trust, and support. Loving a partner unconditionally makes them feel stable and wanted. Most of us can feel insecure during turbulent times, but some relatively simple effort can be the difference between relationship success and failure.


When we have been with a partner for a long period, it becomes easier to know whether or not they are lying. It is almost instinctual, a sixth sense. Lies are a big indication that a partner may be having an affair.

No connection

Connection differs from communication, since connection is chemistry. Every couple experiences the “honeymoon period”, but then comes the sedentary period when excuses take over the bedroom fun. Working through these issues is obviously dependent on the open mindedness of each couple, as toys and role-play are two fun ways to stimulate the senses and recreate that animal attraction.

I am not opposed to divorce, as long as each couple has worked through all options, but if there is no effort, no connection, no communication, a partner is telling lies, and you feel resentment from a partner, is it time to consider leaving your relationship?


Grace Pamer is a full time romance and relationship writer. She writes romance and marriage proposal tip columns for various publications including YourTango.com and GalTime.com. As seen on FoxNews.com, Cosmopolitan.com, DivineCaroline.com and CanadianLiving.com to name but a few.

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One Response to “5 Signs It’s Time To Leave Your Relationship”

  1. Reply Tammy R says:

    Good morning, Grace! I really like how you gave an example from your own life. The fact that you and your husband worked through this difficult time and shared it with us is reassuring that, indeed, love is worth it.

    Except when it isn’t, and you made that point too. I am the child of divorced parents, and that is ok. I am living a very happy life. I am not scarred for life or any such thing. In fact, I was opened up to a whole new way of thinking about the world.

    I love your point about connection and communication not being synonymous. I had never thought of that!

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