Love is a many splendored thing, so the saying goes. There’s another one that says love is blind. The truth is probably a mixture of the two and somewhere in between, but we all know couples who are clearly in love and committed to each other, yet seem unlikely somehow. Maybe that’s because for each of us there are characteristics a person might have that would simply make a relationship impossible. We all have our own little no-nos, that in another person would make a budding romance stop in its tracks – kind of like eating crackers in bed (for me anyway). But are there common relationship killers that we all pretty much share? Here are a few that seem to be up for nomination.
1. Relationship Killers: Bad Hygiene
In these days of powders, sprays and treatments for just about any cleanliness issue, there is no excuse for any kind of problem in the area of hygiene. Most of us would be apt to stop a potential romance if we discovered that a shower a week was the norm for our lover, or that a toothbrush seemed to be unused. Of course, there are differing tolerance levels in all of us for this sort of thing, but in general, keeping clean is a requirement for a relationship to continue.
2. Relationship Killers: Lack of Social Graces
Sometimes you meet someone who, no matter how attractive, sexy, magnetic, or powerful he or she is, just can’t seem to fit in. These are the types who, intentionally or not, are at times insulting, verbally abusive, impolite, intrusive, and just plain hard to get along with in a social setting. This person may be perfectly acceptable or even charming in a one-on-one situation with you, but take him or her to a party and disaster strikes. For most of us, this quality is a relationship murderer.
3. Relationship Killers: Lack of Generosity
Sometimes people meet, date, have feelings for each other, and then you discover that the person you are with is stingy – thrifty has been passed by and has been surpassed by a complete lack of generosity. Often stingy people are able to conceal this characteristic until it’s almost too late – but usually can’t keep up a pretense forever. This one is a definite love buster, because if he or she can’t exhibit some largess with the funds, you will one day be the recipient of the results of this behavior.
4. Relationship Killers: Lack of Compassion
If a potential partner or someone whom you have even fallen in love with starts to show true colors like this one, it’s time to end it. A lack of tolerance, consideration, forgiveness, or any combination of these traits is something that you simply shouldn’t have to put up with. And don’t make the mistake of thinking you can change a person by example either – you’ll be judged as weak or deficient in character and the whole thing will fall apart anyway, so it’s best to cut your losses.
5. Relationship Killers: Selfishness in General
Humans who fall in love can tolerate many minor faults, and still have a happy relationship – after all, none of us are perfect. But if you find over time that the person you are in a romantic relationship with is selfish and self-centered, in the bedroom, with friends, with family, or in any other way, you should consider where this is all heading. Such a person can’t really be trusted to attend to your needs and to take care of you in the long haul, and it’s better to end the relationship than to take that risk.
So that’s one possible list but what are your main bugbears? Have you ever dumped a guy or gal for failing to meet your own unwritten list? How did they fall foul? Did you put up with the issue for a while and then finally have enough or do you find it hard to tolerate any of the relationship killers on your list? Please leave your comments below.